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Tell IHOP to Be Nice to Chickens

If I were a chicken, I know I wouldn’t want to be a nugget (or a patty, or a buffalo ranch sandwich, or whatever; you get the idea). I also wouldn’t want my embryos eaten, either. I’m sure I’d be a pro-choice chicken, but I’d much rather have my yolk and whatnot go to embryonic chicken stem cell research rather than an omelet. That would just be too weird.

But if I had to be somebody’s food, I would want to at least be happy food. I wouldn’t want to live what little life I had in a tiny cramped cage, being pecked or peed on by my neighbor. I would want to be able to turn around, take a dump in different place than the one I’m sitting in, that kind of thing.

That actually sort of sounds like my first apartment, only worse.

Did you know that Trader Joe’s, Ben & Jerry’s, Burger King, Wendy’s and Denny’s all let their chickens run around, cage-free? Maybe they know that cage-free birds are simply healthier and happier. Maybe they’re just nicer people. Maybe they caved in to the demands of animal activists who asked for more humane treatment (which was definitely the case with Ben & Jerry’s, Trader Joe’s and Wendy’s—the last of which just started the policy this year).

Whatever the reason, we know it can be done by major egg users, so why isn’t it being done across the board?

Take IHOP, for example. They refuse to buy from free-range farms—opting instead for hens crammed into battery cages. Maybe they think that makes more eggs? Er, cramped conditions make the eggs…taste better? That hens who can’t move, um, make bigger eggs? Of course, it could be a question of dollars; however, if it were that expensive, I doubt Wendy’s would’ve jumped aboard the cage-free train.

Maybe IHOP just doesn’t know how bad it is. Thankfully, the Humane Society of the United States has some undercover footage to show IHOP what happens when these cramped chickens get sick, hurt, and live on top of other dead birds.

But wait… IHOP, you’ve been shown the footage already! Why aren’t you ending your support of this cruelty? Surely you’re not that masochistic? I mean, come on, pancakes and NFL-sized combos are fattening artery-cloggers, for sure; but at least your patrons get to choose what they put in their mouths.

The source of the eggs they eat, of course, are a different story.

If you want to take action against IHOP’s chicken cruelty, you can see the video and make a call to their CEO here.